On naming our young-uns

DJ and I were talking about my kids and (kinda-sorta) grand-children (children of my ex's daughter). I remembered when my grandson was born and that the parents decided to name him after his father (a practice about which I have reservations), but couldn't decide on "Jr." or "II" (the Second).

My response was "why not 'the next'?" and use "Next" as a nickname.

Think of the benefits:

• It's unique. Who else would have that nickname?
• It'd drive bureaucrats crazy on all those forms he and his parents will have to fill out.
• When he's older and waiting in line (as in at the Division of Motor Vehicles) and they call out "Next!" he goes to the head of the line!

Naturally I got shot down, but not before I had already used that nickname. At church. A lot.

So, six weeks or so after Next was born, his momma brought him to church. She walks in the door, and SWOOSH! -- all the women of the church swarmed over her and the child. You could hear them across the parish hall "There's NEXT!".

Everyone thought it was funny. Except my (then) wife. And her daughter. Some people have trouble with jokes . . .

About my reservations on naming kids after yourself: It boils down to confusion. In today's society with credit reports, scores, documents and so forth ad infinitum, it's not IF there will be a mixup, but WHEN there'll be a mixup. And mixups cause damage both ways. If the father's credit bottoms out, the kid suffers. If the kid grows up and decides not to play by the credit rules, dad's credit suffers. I've represented people on both sides of the equation and it's never easy to fix.

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