Posts
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Payday lenders are the scourge of the earth. Just totally pissed one
off: he called my 'creditor line' (phone number for creditors of people
I've been appointed guardian for), and I called back the number left.
My conversation with the collection agent:
CA: Mr. Puffuffnick, to verify you identity, your social security number ends in 1234, correct?
ME: That's close enough.
CA: We're getting ready to send out to the court papers to collect on a pay-day loan.
ME: (loud, obnoxious laughter)
CA: What's so funny?
ME: (in between laughs) You really think I'm gonna pay that?
CA: We'll get a judgment.
ME: (chuckling) so what?
CA: Don't you want to pay it?
ME: (with a helluva smile in my voice) Why would I?
CA: Because you got the money
ME: And had a memorable drunk with it. May even have gotten laid, too!
CA: Don't you want to pay it?
ME: Hell No. Good luck trying!
CA: Have a nice holiday.
ME: I will with the money I'm not sending you.
(end of conversation)
Showing posts with label The Circus of Commerce. Show all posts
Showing posts with label The Circus of Commerce. Show all posts
Sunday, December 16, 2018
Why collection agents hate me . . .
.
.
Since I serve as guardian for a number of people, their
creditors try to make me pay them. Most of the time the creditors have bought
the account. See my earlier discussion
here: http://rossiferous.blogspot.com/2011/09/drive-collection-agents-nuts.html
There is one very memorable call with a CA (CollectionAgent)
– and probably my favorite war story. The
individual I was guardian was 94 years old at that time (he’s still alive at
102!). the call went like this:
CA: I’m looking for
Irving Puffuffnick
ME: Yeah
CA: Irving, to verify
your identity, does your social security number end in 1234?
ME: That’s close
enough.
CA: Irving, Sleazo,
Inc. has bought your Wells Fargo credit Card Account. You owe $7492.11
ME: “Cool!”
CA: We need you to
make payments.
ME: I can send $1.00
per month.
CA: That’s not
enough. Remember you used that money.
ME: And I had a damn
good time with it too.
CA: Why won’t you pay
more?
ME: I don’t feel like
it. What are you going to do about it?
CA: We’ll have to sue
you
ME: Hell, son, look
at my age. I could be dead by the time
it gets to court!
CA: (after looking up
‘my’ age) Wow. You’re really up there! But
you sound younger than your age.
ME: It’s that Viagra,
sonny, it’s good for more than humpin’.
CA: (click)
Wednesday, November 9, 2016
Stupid Wells Fargo Story of the Day . . .
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(or is it just the story of the hour?)
Represent a client who owns a 1/2 interest in some property - she got it by
will from her father who got it by will from his wife who, with her ex husband,
got the property by deed. Sent them a copy of all documentation and title
search so my client would be listed as a co-owner of the property. Of course,
wills operate to transfer an interest in property.
Today I get a letter from Wells saying client "as potential successor in
interest who can receive limited account information . . "
and "We understand that [client] is 1/2 owner of this property. In order
for us to update the account with this information, please provide us a copy of
the recorded deed".
My response:
In your letter you ask for “a copy of
the recorded deed”. There is no
‘recorded deed’. The documentation you
have – which includes the Recorded Wills of the prior owners – is all that has
ever been required under the statutory and common laws of the Commonwealth of
Virginia since it was first colonized in 1607 to fully vest title in [client].
======
Reminds me of the fabled 'letter
from a Louisiana Lawyer" . . .
A New Orleans lawyer sought a FHA (Federal Housing Administration) loan for
a client. He was told the loan would be granted if he could prove satisfactory
title to a parcel of property being offered as collateral. The title to the
property dated back to 1803, which took the lawyer three months to track down.
After sending the information to the FHA, he received the following reply:
After sending the information to the FHA, he received the following reply:
Upon review of your letter adjoining your client's loan application, we note that the request is supported by an Abstract of Title. While we compliment the able manner in which you have prepared and presented the application, we must point out that you have only cleared title to the proposed collateral back to 1803. Before final approval can be accorded, it will be necessary to clear the title back to its origin.Annoyed, the lawyer responded as follows:
Your letter regarding title in Case No. 189156 has been received. I note that you wish to have title extended further than theThey got it.194 years covered by the present application. I was unaware that any educated person in this country, particularly those working in the property area, would not know that Louisiana was purchased by the U.S. from France in 1803, the year of origin identified in our application. For the edification of uninformed FHA bureaucrats, the title to the land prior to U.S. ownership was obtained from France, which had acquired it by Right of Conquest from Spain. The land came into possession of Spain by Right of Discovery made in the year 1492 by a sea captain named Christopher Columbus, who had been granted the privilege of seeking a new route to India by the then reigning monarch, Isabelle. The good queen, being a pious woman and careful about titles, almost as much as the FHA, took the precaution of securing the blessing of the Pope before she sold her jewels to fund Columbus' expedition. Now the Pope, as I'm sure you know, is the emissary of Jesus Christ, the Son of God. And God, it is commonly accepted, created this world. Therefore, I believe it is safe to presume that He also made that part of the world called Louisiana. He, therefore, would be the owner of origin. I hope to hell you find His original claim to be satisfactory. Now, may we have our damn loan?
Thursday, July 9, 2015
More #WellsFargo nonsense
.
Another reason NOT to bank at #WellsFargo.
Just had another client have bad experience with #WellsFargo - client is a successor under Virginia Law to a decedent. Decedent's estate is only $2000 in #WellsFargo account. Account absolutely qualifies for small estate treatment (which in Virginia is anything under $50,000.00, and the law holds the bank harmless). Client goes to bank and is told that "Wells Fargo policy does not accept the Small Estate Act and you will have to go to the courthouse and get a letter of qualification"
Another reason NOT to bank at #WellsFargo.
Just had another client have bad experience with #WellsFargo - client is a successor under Virginia Law to a decedent. Decedent's estate is only $2000 in #WellsFargo account. Account absolutely qualifies for small estate treatment (which in Virginia is anything under $50,000.00, and the law holds the bank harmless). Client goes to bank and is told that "Wells Fargo policy does not accept the Small Estate Act and you will have to go to the courthouse and get a letter of qualification"
So, the idiots at #WellsFargo want the client to spend hundreds of
dollars and a lot of time and hassle for a measly $2000. I ask everyone
to remember that when choosing a bank. It is crap such as this that
have caused me to either remove or advise clients to remove (in
aggregate) a couple of million dollars of deposits from that bank and go
to one with more sense. And a lawyer friend in Richmond claims to have
done the same with over $20 Million in deposits at #WellsFargo.
I first posted this on Facebook - in 30 minutes there are already 5 shares. Tells you what people think about #WellsFargo. Roanoke USED to have Bank of America (probably the only national bank harder to deal with than #WellsFargo) here , but somehow we ran them away and they sold out.
.
I first posted this on Facebook - in 30 minutes there are already 5 shares. Tells you what people think about #WellsFargo. Roanoke USED to have Bank of America (probably the only national bank harder to deal with than #WellsFargo) here , but somehow we ran them away and they sold out.
.
Friday, May 22, 2015
ID Overkill . . .
.
Last night my wife and I went to the local Applebees(tm) for dinner. As is my custom I ordered a beer with dinner. Imagine my surprise when the waitress - young enough to be my grand-daughter - asked for my ID.
She immediately shattered any illusion she was trying to flatter my grey, fat, 64-year old physique, but explained that in Tennessee another Applebees lost their license because they provided a beverage to someone who was of sufficient age but their ID HAD EXPIRED.
The patent stupidity and lack of logic is ridiculous. Not Applebees for protecting itself (I hope Virginia's ABC Board, untrained as a lot of its agents may be - especially in Charlottesville - would go that far). But Tennessee for requiring a "Valid" ID for proof of age. As an identification, even an expired drivers license should identify the holder. As a license to drive (or do whatever) the expiration should only mean that the person can no longer do that function legally.
Do we cease to exist when our ID expires? Should the Right To Life faction of our society be told of this problem and take action?
So as I was fuming (Rossiferous scale of 1) my wife pointed out that there is a notary she deals with who will refuse to notarize a document if the person signing has an 'expired' ID.
And DMV, which is one of the most hated agencies in the Commonwealth of Virginia (and probably a lot of other states) will not accept an expired driver's license as identification of the individual when they show up two days after it expired to get it renewed. That means the individual has to get their birth certificate or passport or some other 'acceptable' documents to start the licensing process all over again.
This is not an earth-shattering problem but still a major inconvenience to us. We need to get our legislators to define 'Valid' ID as one issued by a recognized agency which identifies the holder by whatever criteria required; whether or not expired for the purpose of licensing the holder to perform some function (e.g. driving), is nevertheless valid for purposes of identifying the individual or their age.
.
Last night my wife and I went to the local Applebees(tm) for dinner. As is my custom I ordered a beer with dinner. Imagine my surprise when the waitress - young enough to be my grand-daughter - asked for my ID.
She immediately shattered any illusion she was trying to flatter my grey, fat, 64-year old physique, but explained that in Tennessee another Applebees lost their license because they provided a beverage to someone who was of sufficient age but their ID HAD EXPIRED.
The patent stupidity and lack of logic is ridiculous. Not Applebees for protecting itself (I hope Virginia's ABC Board, untrained as a lot of its agents may be - especially in Charlottesville - would go that far). But Tennessee for requiring a "Valid" ID for proof of age. As an identification, even an expired drivers license should identify the holder. As a license to drive (or do whatever) the expiration should only mean that the person can no longer do that function legally.
Do we cease to exist when our ID expires? Should the Right To Life faction of our society be told of this problem and take action?
So as I was fuming (Rossiferous scale of 1) my wife pointed out that there is a notary she deals with who will refuse to notarize a document if the person signing has an 'expired' ID.
And DMV, which is one of the most hated agencies in the Commonwealth of Virginia (and probably a lot of other states) will not accept an expired driver's license as identification of the individual when they show up two days after it expired to get it renewed. That means the individual has to get their birth certificate or passport or some other 'acceptable' documents to start the licensing process all over again.
This is not an earth-shattering problem but still a major inconvenience to us. We need to get our legislators to define 'Valid' ID as one issued by a recognized agency which identifies the holder by whatever criteria required; whether or not expired for the purpose of licensing the holder to perform some function (e.g. driving), is nevertheless valid for purposes of identifying the individual or their age.
.
Friday, May 8, 2015
The Fax Blast
.
I will freely admit that at times I am slow completing assignments and I try to consider that trait when working with others. There are times, however, when all involved must move quickly to protect or promote rights of clients and delay hurts. About once a year I get someone who has a reputation of not responding and -- true to form -- they don't do what they say they will anywhere near timely.
.
Enter the Fax Blast. I learned about it the hard way (see first sentence above)
.
It consists of:
After a few days I'm using more and more of the recipient's fax paper and ink/toner.
After a week it goes to twice a day.
After two weeks, HOURLY. I've only had to threaten this level once.
It's a dirty job but someone's gotta do it
.
I will freely admit that at times I am slow completing assignments and I try to consider that trait when working with others. There are times, however, when all involved must move quickly to protect or promote rights of clients and delay hurts. About once a year I get someone who has a reputation of not responding and -- true to form -- they don't do what they say they will anywhere near timely.
.
Enter the Fax Blast. I learned about it the hard way (see first sentence above)
.
It consists of:
- FAXBLAST cover sheet (simply a cover sheet with a line stating "REMINDER NUMBER and a series of numbers 1 thru 25 or so, spaced so they can be circled easily)
- Confirmation sheets (note plural) printed by my fax machine.
- Whatever memo/document the recipient should act upon.
After a few days I'm using more and more of the recipient's fax paper and ink/toner.
After a week it goes to twice a day.
After two weeks, HOURLY. I've only had to threaten this level once.
It's a dirty job but someone's gotta do it
.
Monday, February 18, 2013
How to Help the Post Ofice
.
Just received more junk mail. Actually I get a LOT of junk mail given my estate/guardianship work and the fact that I have a lot of decedents'/wards' mail forwarded to my office. Usually we just toss it.
However one caught my eye, even more so given that they had a 'postage paid business reply thing' enclosed.
As I understand it, the post office charges more for Business Reply mail than usual because of their extra handling.
And the Post Office has serious financial problems, due in part to the stupid Congress. (Aren't "Stupid" and "Congress" are redundant terms?) and due in part to a lot more email instead of snail mail.
So to help the Post Office we need to send more snail mail.
And business reply envelopes are snail mail.
So I helped the Post Office revenues. And even put a note on the envelope thanking the sender for helping the Post Office in it's fiscal difficulties.
If we all did this . . . .
.
Just received more junk mail. Actually I get a LOT of junk mail given my estate/guardianship work and the fact that I have a lot of decedents'/wards' mail forwarded to my office. Usually we just toss it.
However one caught my eye, even more so given that they had a 'postage paid business reply thing' enclosed.
As I understand it, the post office charges more for Business Reply mail than usual because of their extra handling.
And the Post Office has serious financial problems, due in part to the stupid Congress. (Aren't "Stupid" and "Congress" are redundant terms?) and due in part to a lot more email instead of snail mail.
So to help the Post Office we need to send more snail mail.
And business reply envelopes are snail mail.
So I helped the Post Office revenues. And even put a note on the envelope thanking the sender for helping the Post Office in it's fiscal difficulties.
If we all did this . . . .
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Sunday, January 20, 2013
More Borg fun
.
Ya gotta be a StarTrek - The Next Generation fan to understand this one . . .
I'm a member of a group of lawyers who use a "Listserv" which is an email blast to others who choose to subscribe. I am - probably - overactive on the listserv.
I used the term "Borg" to refer to WellsFargo and Bank of America (who have an unfortunately large presence in Virginia).
It seems to have caught on.
It started with my question:
Ya gotta be a StarTrek - The Next Generation fan to understand this one . . .
I'm a member of a group of lawyers who use a "Listserv" which is an email blast to others who choose to subscribe. I am - probably - overactive on the listserv.
I used the term "Borg" to refer to WellsFargo and Bank of America (who have an unfortunately large presence in Virginia).
It seems to have caught on.
It started with my question:
I've got to go get info from one of the Borg and am anticipating the usual
crap.
and I continued with a suggestion of how I might annoy and try to get the attention of the Borg and invited comments. [I'm not including the suggestion here as it involves lawyer-client privilege]
One of the founders of our group said:
Since
we’re using ST TNG vernacular, I say “make it so!" to my suggestion.
Another member chimed in with
I
don't know Ross, you might need to start with President and CEO of Borg Bank,
N.A. and then require that the Bank provide you with appropriate organizational
documents verifying which Borg officers in Virginia have authority to speak on
the collective's behalf. Until they provide you with that information, you can
tell them that only the President and CEO can talk to you.
which I think is a good tactic . . .
Another member -- responding to the seriousness of the problem -- mentioned a fairly high up contact or two she has at WellsBorgo (did I just coin another phrase? is that like "Borg of America"? ) and suggested a meeting with the state chapter to discuss communication problems with that collective.
There were a number of comments very supportive of a meeting and one is in the process of being organized. We've even picked a spokesperson/moderator for the meeting; and one of the comments about picking an emissary was:
I think [Irving] would be a great representative for the Federation, if he's willing .
Irving is willing. With that news, our group's leader said:
Thanks
Irving -- I guess that makes you the leader of the landing party into the BORG
hive. The rest of us will back you up with our phasers set to stun.
Unfortunately, if you remember the actual landing parties that entered a BORG
hive ship, they were completely ignored by the Collective as irrelevant unless
and until a member of the landing party started vaporizing the BORG drones. I
am afraid that we will be treated the same – ignored unless and until we start
doing some real damage to the bank.
I
still think, as I thought years ago, that the only way to get the attention of
the BORG is to organize and publicize a formal boycott of the bank, where every
member of [our group] advised every one of our respective clients to avoid using the
BORG bank and we put out a press release to this effect and actually try to get
some real publicity (such as TV and radio coverage around the state) of how bad
the BORG is. Only then, I think, is there any chance that they will actually
care about what we say.
My response to the group's leader:
You're a real Trekkie! Perfect analogy and I agree totally.
(doing Picard's finger thing . . . ) "Engage!"
Of course, for years I've been discouraging my clients and friends and readers from opening or keeping an account at WellsBorgo [and Borg of America]. And withdrawn every penny I could.
.
.
Wednesday, December 26, 2012
Big Bank Borg
.
Just got a list-serv email from a colleague who had a headache with Wells Fargo. (It, along with Bank of America is among the worst financial institutions to deal with) And "Headache" and "Wells Fargo" are kinda redundant terms.
In my colleague's words:
That post inspired a few comments, one being that with the flies at that bank, honey doesn't work and you gotta use vinegar. I then observed that their Borg Assimilated Mentality chokes getting things done. Star Trek - Next Gen. fans will understand the reference, if you don't, click the link.
But this inspired an idea: Maybe "Borg" could be a good code word for 'too big for their britches and incapable of dealing intelligently with . . . (whatever)' AS IN: "had to deal with the Borg at WF" Yeah, you gotta be a (old) trekkie to appreciate it.
.
.olleague then posted on a group list-serv that "Creative Salem
Just got a list-serv email from a colleague who had a headache with Wells Fargo. (It, along with Bank of America is among the worst financial institutions to deal with) And "Headache" and "Wells Fargo" are kinda redundant terms.
In my colleague's words:
A sister qualified to administer
her brother’s estate. Then she went to Wells Fargo, his bank, and was told that
she would need a court order to access his funds. She successfully opened an
estate account at Wells and attempted to deposit several checks, including his
final paycheck. Wells refused to accept the deposit until she had obtained a
court order.
Inspired by the creativity
coming out of Salem, I sought and followed Ross’ suggestion – sue a bank and it
will come calling. I filed a Warrant in Debt and listed the claim as “Failure
to permit court-appointed Administrator access to decedent's property,
including, but not limited to, bank accounts, safe deposit boxes, credit cards,
etc. See attached Certificate of Qualification and death certificate.” Lo and
behold, I got a call from the legal department at Wells Fargo
today.
That post inspired a few comments, one being that with the flies at that bank, honey doesn't work and you gotta use vinegar. I then observed that their Borg Assimilated Mentality chokes getting things done. Star Trek - Next Gen. fans will understand the reference, if you don't, click the link.
But this inspired an idea: Maybe "Borg" could be a good code word for 'too big for their britches and incapable of dealing intelligently with . . . (whatever)' AS IN: "had to deal with the Borg at WF" Yeah, you gotta be a (old) trekkie to appreciate it.
.
.olleague then posted on a group list-serv that "Creative Salem
Sunday, November 4, 2012
Attaboy for Verizon
.
We fuss and moan about the lack of service from big corporations. Y’all certainly have seen me fuss and complain about banks. (No, they’re not any better). I’ve always felt that if you complain when things go wrong, when something is done ‘beyond’ what you expect, you should give credit.
I know a lot of people have problems with Verizon. I haven’t exactly had smooth sailing. But today I had a Verizon experience that was great.
I went into the office today – Sunday – to do some work. My internet connection was down – DSL through my Fax line. I checked further and found that there wasn’t a dial tone on the line either. I did a little trouble shooting on this end to make sure nothing in the building caused the problem. After eliminating that, I called and got the computer.
Verizon’s computer response system has a lot of limitations, but in the instance of ‘no dial tone’ it walked me through the steps (which I had already done, so I responded accordingly) and then scheduled an appointment for Monday “between 8 AM and 7 PM”. I can live with next day.
But I didn’t have to wait!
About 45 minutes later someone banged on my back door. I looked and saw a Verizon truck in my parking lot. It was the repair guy (who had been here before) who saw the repair order and my car in the parking lot.
He checked the line inside; went out and checked the pole and found that my line was cut – accidentally – by someone else who went up the pole to fix someone else’s problem. He repaired the cut and did a few other things to enhance the DSL signal to the office.
The fax and DSL line now works – even better than before. And on a Sunday.
Thank you, Verizon.
.
We fuss and moan about the lack of service from big corporations. Y’all certainly have seen me fuss and complain about banks. (No, they’re not any better). I’ve always felt that if you complain when things go wrong, when something is done ‘beyond’ what you expect, you should give credit.
I know a lot of people have problems with Verizon. I haven’t exactly had smooth sailing. But today I had a Verizon experience that was great.
I went into the office today – Sunday – to do some work. My internet connection was down – DSL through my Fax line. I checked further and found that there wasn’t a dial tone on the line either. I did a little trouble shooting on this end to make sure nothing in the building caused the problem. After eliminating that, I called and got the computer.
Verizon’s computer response system has a lot of limitations, but in the instance of ‘no dial tone’ it walked me through the steps (which I had already done, so I responded accordingly) and then scheduled an appointment for Monday “between 8 AM and 7 PM”. I can live with next day.
But I didn’t have to wait!
About 45 minutes later someone banged on my back door. I looked and saw a Verizon truck in my parking lot. It was the repair guy (who had been here before) who saw the repair order and my car in the parking lot.
He checked the line inside; went out and checked the pole and found that my line was cut – accidentally – by someone else who went up the pole to fix someone else’s problem. He repaired the cut and did a few other things to enhance the DSL signal to the office.
The fax and DSL line now works – even better than before. And on a Sunday.
Thank you, Verizon.
.
Thursday, October 4, 2012
Government stupidity
.
Government stupidity.
Yeah, those two words are redundant. But here’s a TRUE story.
Many years ago Puffuffnick owned property, went belly up in a spectacular way, both financially and personally. His executor was left trying to clean up the mess.
One of his properties was needed for a local government project, and the local government offered a very good premium price for the property. Unfortunately Puffuffnick had some IRS problems – they had put a lien on his real estate and that had to be paid off as part of the closing.
Simple: ask the IRS for a payoff or their agreement to release the subject property on payment of all proceeds, right?
Nah. For two months a bunch of lawyers tried to get the IRS to simply acknowledge the request. No luck.
So Puffuffnick’s estate sued, in US District Court: Estate of Puffuffnick vs IRS. The suit said, simply, “Judge: we own this property and the IRS has a lien on it. We’ve sold it and we want to either pay them off or have them agree that they get all the money and will release the lien. Make them answer us”.
This sets in motion the typical government response: “Motion to dismiss because you can’t sue the government”. And they fly a lawyer to Roanoke from DC to appear before the Hon. James Turk to get the thing dismissed. The hearing went sorta like this:
JUDGE: Mr. Government, it seems that the Puffuffnick Estate wants to pay money to the IRS.
GOVERNMENT: Judge, you can’t sue the government. We want the money, but you can’t sue the government and this case needs to be dismissed.
JUDGE: Well, why don’t you simply agree to release the lien and they send you the money.
GOVERNMENT: That has to go through channels.
JUDGE: They’ve tried that for months and no one’s giving them any answer. They need to get this deal closed.
GOVERNMENT: You can’t sue the government.
JUDGE: Well, isn’t the sale for a fair price?
GOVERNMENT: Yes it is for a very good price, but you can’t sue the government.
JUDGE: So if the Government sued and this purchaser offered this money, the government would take the money and agree to it?
GOVERNMENT: Yes, but you can’t sue the government.
JUDGE: So you can’t sue the government but the government can sue Puffuffnick’s Estate?
GOVERNMENT: That’s correct, sir.
JUDGE: Fine. Take this complaint and go to the US Attorney’s office on the next floor; they’ve got white out and typewriters. Put IRS as plaintiff where it has Puffuffnick as plaintiff, and Puffuffnick as defendant instead of IRS. I’ll then enter the order approving the sale, release of the lien and payment of proceeds to the IRS.
GOVERNMENT: But . . . um . . . sir . . . um . . .
JUDGE: I suggest you git up there now.
GOVERNMENT: yes sir.
And so it was done. And the next day the Roanoke Times headline read: “Government gets judgment against Puffuffnick Estate”.
You can’t make it up, can you?
.
Government stupidity.
Yeah, those two words are redundant. But here’s a TRUE story.
Many years ago Puffuffnick owned property, went belly up in a spectacular way, both financially and personally. His executor was left trying to clean up the mess.
One of his properties was needed for a local government project, and the local government offered a very good premium price for the property. Unfortunately Puffuffnick had some IRS problems – they had put a lien on his real estate and that had to be paid off as part of the closing.
Simple: ask the IRS for a payoff or their agreement to release the subject property on payment of all proceeds, right?
Nah. For two months a bunch of lawyers tried to get the IRS to simply acknowledge the request. No luck.
So Puffuffnick’s estate sued, in US District Court: Estate of Puffuffnick vs IRS. The suit said, simply, “Judge: we own this property and the IRS has a lien on it. We’ve sold it and we want to either pay them off or have them agree that they get all the money and will release the lien. Make them answer us”.
This sets in motion the typical government response: “Motion to dismiss because you can’t sue the government”. And they fly a lawyer to Roanoke from DC to appear before the Hon. James Turk to get the thing dismissed. The hearing went sorta like this:
JUDGE: Mr. Government, it seems that the Puffuffnick Estate wants to pay money to the IRS.
GOVERNMENT: Judge, you can’t sue the government. We want the money, but you can’t sue the government and this case needs to be dismissed.
JUDGE: Well, why don’t you simply agree to release the lien and they send you the money.
GOVERNMENT: That has to go through channels.
JUDGE: They’ve tried that for months and no one’s giving them any answer. They need to get this deal closed.
GOVERNMENT: You can’t sue the government.
JUDGE: Well, isn’t the sale for a fair price?
GOVERNMENT: Yes it is for a very good price, but you can’t sue the government.
JUDGE: So if the Government sued and this purchaser offered this money, the government would take the money and agree to it?
GOVERNMENT: Yes, but you can’t sue the government.
JUDGE: So you can’t sue the government but the government can sue Puffuffnick’s Estate?
GOVERNMENT: That’s correct, sir.
JUDGE: Fine. Take this complaint and go to the US Attorney’s office on the next floor; they’ve got white out and typewriters. Put IRS as plaintiff where it has Puffuffnick as plaintiff, and Puffuffnick as defendant instead of IRS. I’ll then enter the order approving the sale, release of the lien and payment of proceeds to the IRS.
GOVERNMENT: But . . . um . . . sir . . . um . . .
JUDGE: I suggest you git up there now.
GOVERNMENT: yes sir.
And so it was done. And the next day the Roanoke Times headline read: “Government gets judgment against Puffuffnick Estate”.
You can’t make it up, can you?
.
Friday, March 16, 2012
Another Wells Fargo story . . .
.
As if there weren’t enough reasons to stay away from Wells Fargo Bank, here’s another.
There was a brief article in the Thursday, March 15, 2012, edition of The Roanoke Times about some guy getting sentenced for identity theft. It seems that in 2010, Wachovia Bank (then owned by Wells Fargo; now actually called Wells Fargo) sent someone else’s social security number to the criminal who used it to open a bunch of accounts and charged at least $11,000.00. The Roanoke Times article
Excerpts from the story:
We all make mistakes; I certainly have and probably more than my share. But when you make a mistake, you help fix it. If you’re honorable. If you care about people and your customers. If you’re NOT Wells Fargo.
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As if there weren’t enough reasons to stay away from Wells Fargo Bank, here’s another.
There was a brief article in the Thursday, March 15, 2012, edition of The Roanoke Times about some guy getting sentenced for identity theft. It seems that in 2010, Wachovia Bank (then owned by Wells Fargo; now actually called Wells Fargo) sent someone else’s social security number to the criminal who used it to open a bunch of accounts and charged at least $11,000.00. The Roanoke Times article
Excerpts from the story:
[The Victim] had a terrible time straightening out the credit history and Social Security information, but that is under way,” [the prosecuting attorney] said of the victim during the hearing.
[The Judge] asked [the prosecutor] whether [Wells Fargo] had been approached about the mistake, and whether the bank was willing to “step up to the plate” and help with a resolution to the matter.
“We suggested that but were soundly rebuffed,” [the prosecutor] said.
We all make mistakes; I certainly have and probably more than my share. But when you make a mistake, you help fix it. If you’re honorable. If you care about people and your customers. If you’re NOT Wells Fargo.
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Monday, March 12, 2012
Wells Fargo Is Stupid (in my opinion)
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I’m guardian for a guy (“Irving”) who is in a nursing home for the rest of his life. He owns a house purchased for too much money by a agent under a power of attorney that was fired by the Court after which I was appointed. The guy owns a house with a Veterans Administration loan administered by Wells Fargo. I just had ANOTHER frustrating discussion with Wells Fargo which, in my opinion, is corporately too stupid to exist.
The value of the house is $115,000.00; the loan balance is $135,000.00 (not counting late charges, interest, etc. because I'm not going to waste his money). I filed a motion to abandon the property and allow it to be foreclosed as it’s upside down, and the motion explains that he’s in a nursing home and his income has to pay for his care, not for property that he’ll never get back.
Wells Fargo got a copy of all the court papers; a while ago I got a call and was assigned a ‘single point of contact’ (which OF CURSE has changed) (pun intended). Today I was called by the ‘new’ point of contact.
First, the ‘contact’ called me his power of attorney; I’m the GUARDIAN with a court order – that trumps a POA any day of the week, but (in my opinion) Wells Fargo is too stupid to know that.
Then I was told that they were abandoning the ‘deed in lieu’ process because:
“Irving” hadn’t written a hardship letter. All that information is in the Motion to abandon property I filed, but (in my opinion) Wells Fargo is too stupid to know that.
They wanted an income worksheet, but that information for a worksheet is in the Motion to abandon property I filed, but (in my opinion) Wells Fargo is too stupid to know that.
In my opinion, and I told the poor individual this on the phone in my best Rossiferous voice and manner, Wells Fargo will make more money with a foreclosure, and make the Veterans Administration waste taxpayer's dollars on the foreclosure in this day of our Veterans needing all the help available. In my opinion, Wells Fargo is more interested in its own profit than saving the Government money (can anyone say ‘bailout’??). Of course, they’ve paid for what is probably a wasted appraisal and title examination, so they get those dollars from the taxpayer also.
My frustration boiled over. I told the representative that she’s only a small cog for a very stupid bank, and asked her to put in the notes, in all caps, that “WELLS FARGO CAN *&$# GO TO HELL”, and hung up.
Any question why I’ve closed over one-half million dollars of accounts with those idiots in the past year?
Any question why I urge my friends and clients (and blog readers) to leave Wells Fargo?
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I’m guardian for a guy (“Irving”) who is in a nursing home for the rest of his life. He owns a house purchased for too much money by a agent under a power of attorney that was fired by the Court after which I was appointed. The guy owns a house with a Veterans Administration loan administered by Wells Fargo. I just had ANOTHER frustrating discussion with Wells Fargo which, in my opinion, is corporately too stupid to exist.
The value of the house is $115,000.00; the loan balance is $135,000.00 (not counting late charges, interest, etc. because I'm not going to waste his money). I filed a motion to abandon the property and allow it to be foreclosed as it’s upside down, and the motion explains that he’s in a nursing home and his income has to pay for his care, not for property that he’ll never get back.
Wells Fargo got a copy of all the court papers; a while ago I got a call and was assigned a ‘single point of contact’ (which OF CURSE has changed) (pun intended). Today I was called by the ‘new’ point of contact.
First, the ‘contact’ called me his power of attorney; I’m the GUARDIAN with a court order – that trumps a POA any day of the week, but (in my opinion) Wells Fargo is too stupid to know that.
Then I was told that they were abandoning the ‘deed in lieu’ process because:
“Irving” hadn’t written a hardship letter. All that information is in the Motion to abandon property I filed, but (in my opinion) Wells Fargo is too stupid to know that.
They wanted an income worksheet, but that information for a worksheet is in the Motion to abandon property I filed, but (in my opinion) Wells Fargo is too stupid to know that.
In my opinion, and I told the poor individual this on the phone in my best Rossiferous voice and manner, Wells Fargo will make more money with a foreclosure, and make the Veterans Administration waste taxpayer's dollars on the foreclosure in this day of our Veterans needing all the help available. In my opinion, Wells Fargo is more interested in its own profit than saving the Government money (can anyone say ‘bailout’??). Of course, they’ve paid for what is probably a wasted appraisal and title examination, so they get those dollars from the taxpayer also.
My frustration boiled over. I told the representative that she’s only a small cog for a very stupid bank, and asked her to put in the notes, in all caps, that “WELLS FARGO CAN *&$# GO TO HELL”, and hung up.
Any question why I’ve closed over one-half million dollars of accounts with those idiots in the past year?
Any question why I urge my friends and clients (and blog readers) to leave Wells Fargo?
.
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Wednesday, January 25, 2012
Wells Fargo Complaint
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I just filed a formal complaint against Wells Fargo Bank National Association with the Comptroller of the Currency. They’re the folks who regulate (so to speak) the big banks – you can find them at www.helpwithmybank.gov. I’m administrator of an estate; the decedent had accounts at multiple banks. In EVERY case I went into the bank with:
Only Irving at Wells Fargo was the pain. I first went in mid-December; he said he had to ‘run it by’ someone or other so – after showing him the originals – I left him with the copies and my card, with instructions to ‘call me when the check’s ready’.
I went back today; Irving was there and said he needed something or other and that what I left him wasn’t the original. His intelligence is immediately suspect. I asked why he didn’t call requesting the information. No answer.
Anyhow, the branch manager gets into the act; she gets the check to close the account for me while Irving calls to ‘reactivate’ the account. The flunky on the other end wanted the estate tax ID number. They don’t need it – the account was in the decedent’s social security number and that’s as it should be.
They refused to deliver the check, payable to ‘estate of . . . ‘ so I filed a complaint. And poor Irving, dufus that he is, has his name on it.
Any wonder why I’ve withdrawn nearly One-Half Million Dollars from that bank in the past 6 months?
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I just filed a formal complaint against Wells Fargo Bank National Association with the Comptroller of the Currency. They’re the folks who regulate (so to speak) the big banks – you can find them at www.helpwithmybank.gov. I’m administrator of an estate; the decedent had accounts at multiple banks. In EVERY case I went into the bank with:
- Certified Copy of the death certificate
- Certified Copy of the Court papers appointing me as administrator
- My original passport to prove I’m me.
- Photocopies of the above for the Bank to keep.
Only Irving at Wells Fargo was the pain. I first went in mid-December; he said he had to ‘run it by’ someone or other so – after showing him the originals – I left him with the copies and my card, with instructions to ‘call me when the check’s ready’.
I went back today; Irving was there and said he needed something or other and that what I left him wasn’t the original. His intelligence is immediately suspect. I asked why he didn’t call requesting the information. No answer.
Anyhow, the branch manager gets into the act; she gets the check to close the account for me while Irving calls to ‘reactivate’ the account. The flunky on the other end wanted the estate tax ID number. They don’t need it – the account was in the decedent’s social security number and that’s as it should be.
They refused to deliver the check, payable to ‘estate of . . . ‘ so I filed a complaint. And poor Irving, dufus that he is, has his name on it.
Any wonder why I’ve withdrawn nearly One-Half Million Dollars from that bank in the past 6 months?
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Friday, September 2, 2011
Drive Collection Agents Nuts
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As a lot of my followers know, I serve as guardian and conservator for several people. A number of these folks ran up credit card debt before getting disabled and they're now in a nursing home and receive Medicaid long term care.
I'll admit that I'm not in any hurry to pay their credit cards -- they're pretty close to the bottom of the priority list, if not below the line.
Credit card companies don't keep non-paying accounts -- they sell them to third parties who then try to collect them, and then those guys sell them to fourth, fifth, and so on down the line. After 2 or 3 years the account ends up with a 'bottom feeder' who tries everything to collect. Here's the catch: when the account is sold, all that the purchaser gets is a name, social security number, address and contact info and -- maybe -- some of the account history. They don't get the copies of the original account documents or a detailed charge/payment history of the account.
So the collectors call me wanting to get paid on Irving Puffuffnick's old credit card. Actually they try to talk to Irving himself (and I've pretended to be Irving on more than one occasion -- in a sense I AM Irving by virtue of a court order) and want documentation from me to prove I have authority to act on behalf of Irving.
Of course, before I give them that authority (which is public record if they want to go to the courthouse to look for it - admittedly a long commute for someone in California) I demand proof that they are authorized to discuss the account on behalf of the creditor.
Mexican Standoff? (Wikipedia)
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As a lot of my followers know, I serve as guardian and conservator for several people. A number of these folks ran up credit card debt before getting disabled and they're now in a nursing home and receive Medicaid long term care.
I'll admit that I'm not in any hurry to pay their credit cards -- they're pretty close to the bottom of the priority list, if not below the line.
Credit card companies don't keep non-paying accounts -- they sell them to third parties who then try to collect them, and then those guys sell them to fourth, fifth, and so on down the line. After 2 or 3 years the account ends up with a 'bottom feeder' who tries everything to collect. Here's the catch: when the account is sold, all that the purchaser gets is a name, social security number, address and contact info and -- maybe -- some of the account history. They don't get the copies of the original account documents or a detailed charge/payment history of the account.
So the collectors call me wanting to get paid on Irving Puffuffnick's old credit card. Actually they try to talk to Irving himself (and I've pretended to be Irving on more than one occasion -- in a sense I AM Irving by virtue of a court order) and want documentation from me to prove I have authority to act on behalf of Irving.
Of course, before I give them that authority (which is public record if they want to go to the courthouse to look for it - admittedly a long commute for someone in California) I demand proof that they are authorized to discuss the account on behalf of the creditor.
Mexican Standoff? (Wikipedia)
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Decoding Wells Fargo as an acronym
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The office staff has been complaining about the long lines at Wells Fargo, especially after the formal changeover from Wachovia (which took over from First Union (and whose initials were really appropriate), which took over from Dominion Bank, which grew out of First National Exchange Bank . . . )
So Donna, my right arm and assistant, took a deposit over there and the line for a teller was 'nearly out the door'. While waiting she took the name "Wells Fargo" and broke it down:
"Where Every Line's Longer Seemingly Forever And Rage Grows Often"
Not bad, huh?
Think they'll care? nah. They're too big for their britches.
Guess it's time for me to close all the estate accounts I have there; doubt they'll miss a measly $500K in money.
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The office staff has been complaining about the long lines at Wells Fargo, especially after the formal changeover from Wachovia (which took over from First Union (and whose initials were really appropriate), which took over from Dominion Bank, which grew out of First National Exchange Bank . . . )
So Donna, my right arm and assistant, took a deposit over there and the line for a teller was 'nearly out the door'. While waiting she took the name "Wells Fargo" and broke it down:
"Where Every Line's Longer Seemingly Forever And Rage Grows Often"
Not bad, huh?
Think they'll care? nah. They're too big for their britches.
Guess it's time for me to close all the estate accounts I have there; doubt they'll miss a measly $500K in money.
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Wednesday, March 30, 2011
Cutsey Phone Scripts
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I'm back to the blog. Been kinda busy and didn't realize how long it's been.
I just called a nursing home in Salem, part of a large for-profit nursing home chain headquartered in Roanoke. The poor receptionist is required to answer the phone "It's a great day, thank you for calling (nh name) home of . . . " yadda yadda. It seems to take fifteen seconds and two full breaths to get it all out. As is my nature, I immediately sympathized with her about the mouthful of nonsense she's got to spew every time the phone rings.
Ignoring the fact that it's raining and cold out, negating the 'great day' thing, the routine is silly. To me it's a turn off. Most people don't even listen to it, they wait for the spiel to end and then ask whatever they wanted.
In the office I share with another lawyer, Emily - the best receptionist we've ever had - answers simply "Hart and Hart Attorneys; how may I help you?" It starts the call with basic information: what office the caller got, and then sets the tone of wanting to help the caller.
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I'm back to the blog. Been kinda busy and didn't realize how long it's been.
I just called a nursing home in Salem, part of a large for-profit nursing home chain headquartered in Roanoke. The poor receptionist is required to answer the phone "It's a great day, thank you for calling (nh name) home of . . . " yadda yadda. It seems to take fifteen seconds and two full breaths to get it all out. As is my nature, I immediately sympathized with her about the mouthful of nonsense she's got to spew every time the phone rings.
Ignoring the fact that it's raining and cold out, negating the 'great day' thing, the routine is silly. To me it's a turn off. Most people don't even listen to it, they wait for the spiel to end and then ask whatever they wanted.
In the office I share with another lawyer, Emily - the best receptionist we've ever had - answers simply "Hart and Hart Attorneys; how may I help you?" It starts the call with basic information: what office the caller got, and then sets the tone of wanting to help the caller.
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Wednesday, October 13, 2010
Acronyms
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Just had a good lawyer and good friend call me, and we had a good chuckle over her question.
I'm representing an estate and she the major claimant against the estate. I had sent the final payment with cover letter, receipt and a pre-addressed, stamped, envelope for her to return the receipt once her client signed it. In the letter I referred to the "SASE" - Self-Addressed Stamped Envelope - and she hadn't seen the term before. Actually, it's fallen out of common use; before the internet a lot of advertisements said to use one if you wanted information; now the information is on-line.
But this reminded me of another stupid financial industry story. (here we go again!)
15 or 20 years ago I was working on a Small Business Administration backed loan. Involved were senior finance wonks in Richmond and Occupied (excuse me, that's 'Northern') Virginia. Naturally there had to be hazard insurance on the property, and because of the SBA there were three or four financial fingers in the pie.
Insurance companies don't really care who gets the money in event of a loss; with multiple parties listed as loss payees they frequently list them all and then say "As Their Interests May Appear" or, universally shown in industry shorthand, "ATIMA".
So I get a fax from one of the senior wonks asking "Who is ATIMA?"
DOH! "Here's your sign."
Shoulda sold my bank stock -- all the clues were there . . .
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Just had a good lawyer and good friend call me, and we had a good chuckle over her question.
I'm representing an estate and she the major claimant against the estate. I had sent the final payment with cover letter, receipt and a pre-addressed, stamped, envelope for her to return the receipt once her client signed it. In the letter I referred to the "SASE" - Self-Addressed Stamped Envelope - and she hadn't seen the term before. Actually, it's fallen out of common use; before the internet a lot of advertisements said to use one if you wanted information; now the information is on-line.
But this reminded me of another stupid financial industry story. (here we go again!)
15 or 20 years ago I was working on a Small Business Administration backed loan. Involved were senior finance wonks in Richmond and Occupied (excuse me, that's 'Northern') Virginia. Naturally there had to be hazard insurance on the property, and because of the SBA there were three or four financial fingers in the pie.
Insurance companies don't really care who gets the money in event of a loss; with multiple parties listed as loss payees they frequently list them all and then say "As Their Interests May Appear" or, universally shown in industry shorthand, "ATIMA".
So I get a fax from one of the senior wonks asking "Who is ATIMA?"
DOH! "Here's your sign."
Shoulda sold my bank stock -- all the clues were there . . .
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Wednesday, October 6, 2010
Dumb and Dumber financing
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This is an old story -- about 25 years old -- but it illustrates some of the reasons for the failure of our financial system. Years ago I represented a major national commercial lender -- it's 'out of business' now having merged into one of the megabanks. I'll call it 'BlahCorp' and hope it's not someone's real name, and change names of others as well.
BlahCorp was, at the time, headquartered in Chicago. It specialized in commercial loans for trucks (18-wheelers) and heavy equipment (think Caterpillar, etc.) and so forth. Typically, the dealer selling the item helped the customer get the financing and had some stake in the ability of the customer to meet the payments (in the financial world this is called "recourse" financing)
SwampCorp was an equipment dealer -- earth moving equipment, cranes, all that big stuff you see on highway construction, mining, commercial buildings, etc. Heavy Lifting Inc. was a startup crane contractor in the area and bought $1Million in cranes from SwampCorp (probably $2.5+M now). Jane was President and sole shareholder of Heavy Lifting and submitted the documents to BlahCorp for the financing. Due to the size of the loan, it required approval of the Senior Vice President of Finance in Chicago; on the corporate totem pole he was #3 and had 25 years 'experience'.
Jane submitted financial statements for Heavy Lifting showing that the corporation had about $20,000.00 in equity, at cost value (not liquidation value). Jane had to personally guarantee the loan so submitted a financial statement showing her net worth of $535,000.00: the value of her stock in Heavy Lifting was $500,000.00; the sum total of equity in her other assets was $35,000.00 on a good day.
Heavy Lifting filed bankruptcy and I was hired to protect BlahCorp. The Sr. VP flew to Roanoke for the hearing. I looked at the financing and said "I'm only a lawyer, but I don't understand why you made this loan" He responded that the 'guarantors financial statement was strong'. My response was in the early days of being Rossiferous: "Nonsense; she shows $500,000.00 as value of Heavy Lifting, but it's financial statement shows only $20,000.00; didn't you notice that?"
"Um, we never looked at it that way"
D'OH
And the industry got dumber and dumber since.
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This is an old story -- about 25 years old -- but it illustrates some of the reasons for the failure of our financial system. Years ago I represented a major national commercial lender -- it's 'out of business' now having merged into one of the megabanks. I'll call it 'BlahCorp' and hope it's not someone's real name, and change names of others as well.
BlahCorp was, at the time, headquartered in Chicago. It specialized in commercial loans for trucks (18-wheelers) and heavy equipment (think Caterpillar, etc.) and so forth. Typically, the dealer selling the item helped the customer get the financing and had some stake in the ability of the customer to meet the payments (in the financial world this is called "recourse" financing)
SwampCorp was an equipment dealer -- earth moving equipment, cranes, all that big stuff you see on highway construction, mining, commercial buildings, etc. Heavy Lifting Inc. was a startup crane contractor in the area and bought $1Million in cranes from SwampCorp (probably $2.5+M now). Jane was President and sole shareholder of Heavy Lifting and submitted the documents to BlahCorp for the financing. Due to the size of the loan, it required approval of the Senior Vice President of Finance in Chicago; on the corporate totem pole he was #3 and had 25 years 'experience'.
Jane submitted financial statements for Heavy Lifting showing that the corporation had about $20,000.00 in equity, at cost value (not liquidation value). Jane had to personally guarantee the loan so submitted a financial statement showing her net worth of $535,000.00: the value of her stock in Heavy Lifting was $500,000.00; the sum total of equity in her other assets was $35,000.00 on a good day.
Heavy Lifting filed bankruptcy and I was hired to protect BlahCorp. The Sr. VP flew to Roanoke for the hearing. I looked at the financing and said "I'm only a lawyer, but I don't understand why you made this loan" He responded that the 'guarantors financial statement was strong'. My response was in the early days of being Rossiferous: "Nonsense; she shows $500,000.00 as value of Heavy Lifting, but it's financial statement shows only $20,000.00; didn't you notice that?"
"Um, we never looked at it that way"
D'OH
And the industry got dumber and dumber since.
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Tuesday, October 5, 2010
Monkeys and Bananas
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I just had a client ask me about a form another company wants him to sign as he is renting commercial warehouse space to the other firm. I reviewed the form: It's a hold harmless about engineering and design work, relates to purchase orders, covers subcontractors, etc.
My client had already questioned whether it was needed; the corporate contact said "we're required to get it in all our contracts". My guess is that he has no idea what the form does, just that "Corporate" has said "Get it".
Some years ago a sociologist did an experiment with monkeys. Check it out at Monkeys and Bananas
and a You-Tube: Banana Vid (I really like the corporate suits on the 'monkeys' in the video!)
Probably a lesson for our governments also.
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I just had a client ask me about a form another company wants him to sign as he is renting commercial warehouse space to the other firm. I reviewed the form: It's a hold harmless about engineering and design work, relates to purchase orders, covers subcontractors, etc.
My client had already questioned whether it was needed; the corporate contact said "we're required to get it in all our contracts". My guess is that he has no idea what the form does, just that "Corporate" has said "Get it".
Some years ago a sociologist did an experiment with monkeys. Check it out at Monkeys and Bananas
and a You-Tube: Banana Vid (I really like the corporate suits on the 'monkeys' in the video!)
Probably a lesson for our governments also.
.
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